Urban Spice - Lancaster

Ordered a beef madras and specified extra onions. What arrived had a whole onion plonked in and didn’t seem like any beef madras I’d had before. It was a decent heat and the beef was just right. As a stew I’d say it was excellent but it’s supposed to be a curry. It arrived quickly as well. Unfortunately I had a dicky tummy the next day I then checked the hygiene rating 0 stars! It also seems an upset tummy is a regular thing when eating from these guys. It was good value for money.

I ordered a large donner for delivery. It arrived quickly, was warm and looked and smelt the part. Was also the cheapest large donner on just eat so was well pleased when it also came with those peppers you only get in kebab houses. There was a a lot of fat and grease but that’s to be expected. I’d drank 12 pints of Stella beforehand and this was just the ticket to bolster me before I headed back out to Kanteena to continue until the early hours. It tasted salty, which was fine, the garlic mayo had a weird consistency and tasted a bit like chicken but I still enjoyed it. Got a taxi back to Kanteena and, just as we were pulling up, I soiled it. This was about 20 mins after eating. The guy chucked me out of the car, charged me £75 for a soilage charge and left me in my own poo in the gutter. Kanteena wouldn’t let me in either! Taste 8/10 Price 9/10 Delivery 9/10 Aftermath 0/10 Overall 0/10

Grease is the word, It’s the word that you heard, Everybody has heard, Grease is the word. My toilet is not hydromatic, it’s not ultramatic but now it is certainly grease lightning. The encouragement of John Travolta could not recuperate my poorly state after such a travesty of a culinary endeavour. I came. I ordered. I chundered. Avoid.

I ordered chicken and chips with bbq sauce. The food arrived quickly almost as quickly as my subsequent bowel evacuation, in fact! I expected fried chicken but I got a grilled chicken breast heaped on a token amount of anaemia and undercooked chips smothered in a tasty (albeit salty) BBQ sauce. The sauce was sufficiently thick, salty and tasty to hide the fact that the chips weren’t the only items undercooked. The chicken was as well. I was soon involuntarily producing sauce of my own which was far more liquid than the BBQ sauce. It was cheap and quick, though, but I won’t be back.

The chips were really grim, the onion bhaji were disgusting and they forgot the Naan bread, please don't order from here